Give compliments Anything from you look handsome today, that was a really good steak you cooked for me, I love your eyes. Never stop telling the person you love what you love about them. Don't take for granted that they already know. Remind them.
Appreciate A simple "thank you". Thanks for mowing the yard. Thanks for folding the laundry. Thanks for working hard to provide for us. No thanks is too small or too big. Verbalize your appreciation. It tells your spouse you are grateful for the efforts they put into your marriage and family. When I tell Josh thank you for something, it also reminds me how lucky I feel to have him and all he brings to my life.
Be the first to say "I'm Sorry" Apologize first and fast. On the same note, if you receive a genuine apology, accept it and get on with life. Don't drag an argument out just for entertainment or whatever reason. Move on. Most important Don't go to bed mad. I swear by it.
No sex before love. Conservative, old fashioned, whatever. Wait until you are at least madly in love (not lust) with somebody before you give it up. If they won't wait that long, they weren't worth it anyway. Waiting for sex in a relationship and how the other person handles your decision to do so, I think, says a lot about their character. If they'll wait for you, they care about YOU and not just...well,other stuff. The best part of sex is the emotional connection anyway.
Romance Never neglect it. Romance doesn't have to be elaborate or expensive. Josh loves pink jelly beans, I picked them all out of the bag once and packed them in his suitcase for work. When he found them he knew I thought about him and wanted to make him smile. Easy enough. Romance is your effort. Never stop dating your spouse.
Don't cuss. Simple enough. You won't hear Josh call me a bitch, or an F you coming from my mouth. Your husband/wife is your life partner, your best friend, your sidekick. Name calling and swear words are not for your soulmate. The same words you would use for someone you don't like have no place in your marriage.
Hold hands In the car, walking in the parking lot of walmart, at home on the couch. Do it.
Communicate Don't make a disagreement a guessing game too. John Mayer said it best "Say what you need to say." Be honest.
Spouse=numero uno Your marriage is priority, period.
Mind your own business Keep your marriage sacred. A relationship, the good and bad, isn't for everyone else. It's for the people in it. Don't worry about projecting to the world how happily-ever-after you have it. On the same token your mom, the gardening club, and all of Facebook don't need to know about your disagreements. You don't need people on "your side" in a marriage everyone is on the same team.
I guess that's all the wisdom I have. I heard something in church as a preteen and never forgot it "The best thing a father can do for his children is love their mother" So simple and so true.
No comments:
Post a Comment