Installment III
I thought I'd never get to typing this last post about G's birth. It has been on my to do list and I'm finally getting to it. Thank goodness, it is really important to me to document this before it gets any more hazy in my memory.
After all my visitors came to see me post epidural and the room had cleared out again, my birth photographer arrived. I fretted about if she would be able to make it for months and was so relieved that she did! Photos are so important to me, when something is over the photos are the only physical thing you have left. I'm overly obsessed with them. Any who, her name is Felicia and she captured Georgia's birth in beautiful perfection. She wasn't with us for very long before my epidural was slightly loosing its heavenly effects. I thought okay the totally pain free part was too good to be true. Suck it up buttercup, this is childbirth. You're not riding the teacups at Disney World. Well it got bad. I returned to my wash rag, started making the sex sounds again, and my stinking breath was big bad wolfing it all over everybody. Josh, Caleigh, and Felicia did such a good job shutting up. I wanted it quiet and they obliged. God love them. Once the topic of conversation was how tall my contractions were on the monitor. "Wow this one is HUGE, dang it's already going back up again." I was like "I know they are bad, can we not talk about it??" And then we quit talking about it :)
I once again waited until I felt like I was being murdered through the avenue of the crotch before I asked for an epidural re dose. Not sure how that works, but they can do it and it is very fortunate that they can. I had my posse call Amanda and she broke the news to me that my knight in shining armor, Rick, was in a c-section. Wahhhhh. That means it was unavailable to me for a while. I suffered for what seemed longer than any other woman has every suffered before when Dr Patty came in to check me. He told me I was at 8! Great news! I had an earth shattering revelation and grabbed his arm "Wait! If YOU aren't in the c-section anymore then Rick isn't either!" He told me that I was right but Rick was with the c-section momma in the recovery room so it will be a while longer. Seriously? He has bigger fish to fry in my room, okay? He did eventually show up again and he made me pain free again. I was checked and I was at a 9. Dr Patty told me he would come back in a minute and it would be time to push. I don't know how he knew that I would be complete by then, but hey he is the obstetrical god, not me.
At that point I had the shakes. I looked like I was suffering from Parkinson's and Tourette's. It happens when you are about to/just had a baby. I have witnessed it in other women a million times. Weird that it is me now! Josh flipped on the video camera and asked me if there was anything I wanted to say to Georgia. I say "Hurry" and that's it. How eloquent.
Before I know it my legs are being put up in stirrups and LaDonna, a nurses aide in the women's center, is counting for me to push in sets of three with each contraction. I felt like she was a slave driver. I would pass out to sleep briefly between contractions and she and Amanda would tell me it was time to push...again. I was completely numb from my epidural. I couldn't tell if I was pushing well or not. I just felt like my face was going to explode. If you could die from your face exploding, I was sure I was about to commit suicide. Amanda told me I was being a good pusher, she may have been lying but I bought it. Amanda also asked if Josh wanted to look, he didn't answer her and just stayed where he was like he didn't hear her. I told her to let Caleigh look instead and her brown eyes were so wide with excitement when I told her she could look. Josh eventually came around to watching too. At that point a few other nurses and staff had come in to the room to "help" or watch Georgia be born. So, so much LOVE in that room.
Before I knew it Dr Patty was there, Amelia my angel of a nursery nurse came in, and I knew it was about to get real. In between pushes I could hear Georgia's heartbeat on the monitor being very slow. If I had been the nurse I would have been nervous. But I was so peaceful. I rationally knew the only thing I could do was focus and be the best pusher I could be. So that is what I did. Dr Patty announced that in the next few pushes I would have a baby. I felt absolutely no pain. Just a big tugging suction in my gut.
And then, she was here.
How did it feel? Surreal. I am going to be honest. I didn't cry tears of joy (Caleigh did enough of that for everybody) I didn't feel instantly changed. I felt dead. Like I was floating above my body watching it all happen from the outside. I have watched many women give birth in my time on this earth, and when it was me I felt like I was having an out of body experience. Very dream like. Is this real? It was like an episode of Unsolved Mysteries where someone dies for ten minutes and they see everything from a distance with a heavenly light surrounding the whole occurrence. It is pretty much indescribable in a weird way. I even thought, "I shouldn't feel like this" But now I look back and know I was floating. So many answered prayers in one instant. Too much for this worldly body to process.
It felt like she almost never cried, but I know it wasn't that long. She cried and it was a perfect healthy cry. Music to my ears! She was sat up on my belly and the first thing I said was "She looks like Jeremy!" Which she didn't but, that is what my floating above my body self thought. She was holding her feet in her hands when they put her on me. It was so cute. Josh was standing at my left shoulder and he started talking. Georgia turned her head around to look at him. She knew his voice! I know she did. All the months of him reading to my belly, she knew her daddy's voice. I melted.
Georgia was handed over to Amelia at the infant warmer and Josh walked over to be with her. Dr Patty started rubbing my stomach so hard and I thought "Am I hemorrhaging?" Then he told me to push, oh yeah, gotta get that placenta out. Another big tugging suction feeling and that was over. Amanda asked me if I wanted to see my placenta, sure. Just a regular ole placenta. I asked Dr Patty if I had an episiotomy or not. He started apologetically telling me that he really tried to deliver me intact, but I had a second degree laceration. Meaning I tore instead of being cut. I felt bad for the guy, he was truly sorry. I told him it was fine, I didn't expect in my wildest dreams to deliver intact. And besides, he wasn't the one who came barreling through my vagina and tore it, just an innocent bystander.
Amelia wrapped Georgia in a warmed blanket and I held her again and took her picture. Then she was off to the nursery to be weighed and measured! I could have had the scales brought in the room so Georgia never left, but I decided not to. It would only take a few minutes and it gave everyone in the hallway a glimpse of Georgia. They were allowed to go in the nursery and watch her be put on the scales. My humble gift to them. :)
Now after every prenatal check up I would text a few people with a brief summary of the appointment. I would most times include Georgia's approximate measurements in utero. Every single time his mom would say "Josh was eighteen and a half inches" I will always know how long my husband was at birth...eighteen and a half inches. Must have been really significant to his mom, she seriously told me a million times. :) After G's short little trip to the nursery she was brought back to me. The told me her weight. 6 lb 12.6 oz. A few minutes went by of ooing and ahing over her and I thought to ask how long she was. You guessed it. Eighteen and a half inches. Could she have been anything else?
Georgia was born on 12/21/12. The day the Mayan calender predicted the world would end. The day my life really began. Georgia, what did I do before I loved you?
That is all for now. Maybe I will find time to write about my hoo hah after birth, breastfeeding, my first days home, all my visitors, baby constipation etc. I have ambitions to. Thanks for reading my story.
I would also like to take this time to publically apologize to my nurses for delivering at shift change. I know that sucks.
Peace. Love. Georgia Love.
